Apology to my Player Two

I messed up, too. It hit me really hard today, this realization that I’d pushed too much of the blame over to you. Yes, you were the one who blew the whistle and made the call to end us, but any relationship is a two-player game. And that means that I certainly had a hand in our downfall.

So I’m here now to apologize, in case I haven’t before. I am truly sorry for what we lost and any pain I may have caused you. You didn’t deserve it, and neither did I. You have my sincere apologies, paired with reminders that I hope you won’t take to be excuses.

I’m sorry that I couldn’t be what you needed. I’m human; I’m a work in progress. I’m sorry that I didn’t know how to handle it when we couldn’t find a way to make things work. I shouldn’t have sprung all of that on you the way that I did. I’m sorry if I overstepped my bounds. How could I have known we weren’t on the same page? I’m sorry for the times I didn’t understand. But God knows how hard I tried. I’m sorry if I subconsciously ignored the warning signs you threw to me. They’re only just now becoming clear. I’m sorry if your memories with me aren’t good ones. Mine are. I’m sorry if anything I said in the days after changed the way that my friends think of you. I still think you’re great. I’m sorry if you thought my most recent text was some kind of trap. I’m just genuinely wishing you the best.

A lot of questions still surround the story of us. It felt an awfully lot like a book that was missing all of its middle and end. But I want you to know that I don’t blame you. I didn’t do everything right, and it cost me dearly. I loved and lost, as they say. But I guess that’s just how things go.

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