As this year draws to a close, I’m taking inventory of all the miracles that have graced my life lately. Who I am now versus who I was a year ago is a comparison that, frankly, kind of blows my mind.
2015 has been filled to the brim with some of my highest highs and lowest lows. Some things have been easier to bounce back from than others. Some things have been so inexplicably, breathtakingly beautiful that I never found the words to do them justice. The patience and faith shown to me by others has kept me sane. The personal and spiritual growth that I’ve endured has been the most incredible of experiences. The quiet confidence I’ve gained in my sense of self is massively valuable.
I owe many thanks to many people, and a weakness of mine is that I’m not always great and conveying my gratitude and appreciation. It’s a learning process. But here I am to say thank you.
Thank you to the people who put up with me day in and day out. I know I’m not always easy to be around.
Thank you to the people who provide me with opportunities – to learn, to work, to grow. All of it is shaping me into someone better.
Thank you to the person who has never not been there, and has soothed me through a hysterical late night phone call on more than one occasion. I owe you.
Thank you to the people who encourage me as I set out to chase two very different dreams at the same time. It gets crazy, but you stay.
Thank you to the person who has known me almost all my life and still accepts the privacy I require. I don’t mean to keep you out.
Thank you to the people who stopped in their tracks to heal me in my time of need. I’ll never forget your selflessness.
Thank you to the new people who have opened their homes and lives to me this year. I’m blessed to know you, and I hope your memories are as fond as mine.
Thank you to the people who hold me accountable. I can be flighty and impulsive, so your job is a big one. You do it well.
Thank you to the person who pushed me to break my shell open. I’ll always have a soft spot in my heart for you.
Thank you to the people who drifted away. Friendships sometimes have expiration dates. Nothing we do or say can change that.
Thank you to the people who stayed. There is only so much loss that a person can take at one time.
Thank you to the person who ruined me in the very best way. Given the chance, I’d do it all again. Even knowing how it ends.
Thank you to the people who have taught and pushed me to write more and to write better. It’s the only outlet I have now that I can count on.
Thank you to the people who spread love and understanding everywhere you go. The world isn’t so dark anymore.
Thank you to the people who have shared their stories of love and faith with me. I appreciate your transparency more than you can imagine.
Thank you to the people who turn their pain into poetry. It’s so important not to feel alone when you’re at your worst. Hurt hits all of us eventually.
Thank you to the person who does not yet know me, but chooses to trust that my intentions are good. I won’t let you down.
Finally, thank you to the person I was last November. Things have shifted dramatically, and though it’s been a grueling ride and I’m covered in scars and bruises, I’m happy to have survived this year. I smiled a lot more than I had any right to expect. I learned how to pray and mean it. I found out that time doesn’t always heal wounds. I figured out what I might want to do with my life someday. I learned how and when to seek out help and to accept it graciously without letting pride stand in the way. I accepted that the puzzle pieces aren’t set in stone, and sometimes making things work requires a chisel and a little bit of elbow grease.
I’m a new person, but I’m not really the one to thank. The people around me are responsible for my growth and new sense of humanity. I can’t thank them enough. This is only a small beginning.